Small is beautiful too

One of the lies I've realised I've been 'living under' is that if you are 'getting it right' as a Christian that God will somehow make you 'big' or 'successful' (in a Christian sort of way of course - you know, like writing a bestseller, starting a world-changing non-profit, rescuing 4000 orphans, having a trending blog or being an international speaker).

So then, when your life is 'little' and doesn't seem to have a big impact you think "What am I doing wrong?"

I felt God whisper to my heart that He is way more creative than that.

When I look around at the world God has made, He has done lots of 'big' - mountains, oceans, stars and galaxies.

But He's also done a huge amount of incredible small - caterpillars turning into butterflies, cells containing enough DNA to create a whole person, atoms we can't split into tiny enough pieces to get to the bottom of.

God is a God of incredible variety and creativity. He loves big and He loves small and everything in between.  Just because my life isn't 'big' doesn't mean it isn't the way He wanted it to be. He delights in billions of 'little' stories happening all over the world simultaneously at every moment. He is big enough to be involved in every single story as if it was the only one.

He delights in the hidden stories just like we might delight in discovering a hidden little beach that is beautiful and peaceful. If you blogged, facebooked and tweeted about it, it would be destroyed from being what it is by the deluge of people who would come and crowd out the tranquillity and unspoilt calm.  God doesn't make everyone's story 'big' in terms of lots of people knowing about it or even being affected by it.  I believe for Him, that some of the beauty is in the hidden-ness of it all. He loves to see the life quietly laid down and poured out for Him. He waits to reveal it all in Heaven and reward in full.

This reminds me that the primary audience for my life is God. My purpose is more about my relationship with Him than in the impact I have on the world for Him. I can't do anything about that anyway and He chooses each of us to have different roles.

So when I look at Ann Voskamp or Heidi Baker or anyone else and think I should be like them. God says, "I've already got an Ann Voskamp. I don't want another one. I want a Claire. She's unlike anyone else who has ever lived and I have a journey for her that is unique too"  Yes we can learn from, be encouraged by and inspired by others, but don't feel you have to be them.

So God, thank you for loving me and making me the way I am. You made me on purpose to have a unique place in this world. Thank you for reminding me not to measure my importance by the size of my life. Thank you that my worth comes from You.  Amen.